Don’t it seem like, we always fall into arguments. Then I break you off and you just forget. You make excuses for me and love with no regrets. And you wonder why people have no respect. Because look at what I have created. Even though you know its fabricated. You still get elated. You’re happy when I’m there even though I’m hardly there. But you don’t pay attention to that guy who really cares. You put in time, I put in lies. No matter what you’ll still be mine. Do you need a sign? You wanted a bad boy and you got that. You satisfied? Well are you? You’re hoping I will change but you don’t understand I was the never the right dude to give your heart to? You stupid!
My insecurities bring out the worst in me. And I let them. So I’m gonna take a stand. Be the better man. Reframe who I am. Beat them.
Like wtf. I’m such a sad case right now. I use to live life no worries. No stress. Happy and blessed. Now I freak. I got insecure. Like why? I use to chill out and just met random souls and have fun. Geez. How am I now? This chick needs to go.
I make no sense. I hate emotions. I hate letting people in cause they always leave. Always. And when they do I just feel dumb for trying with them. So I’ve learned not to try. Let shit go and people go. But sometimes I get attached. I start feeling for someone but I never believe anyone could really feel for me. Everyone out to use someone. And I don’t wanna be used. So I keep distant. I try but never give things my all. Never get too involved. I hurt myself cause its easier than being hurt by someone else.
These days are getting Hazey. To focused on things I outta be. Ashamed cause I’m not what they see me to be. I’m feeling like things arent quite what they seem lifes too hard I’m looking forward to my dreams. …. blah. Lifes meant to mean more than this. I’m just too damn curious. Blah. I can’t grasp it. I’m past it. I’m falling. I fell. Well guess only time can tell.
When your not where you wanna be. When you realize your not going as hard as you should be or you could be going. Like your just wasting time. Ugh.
